Thursday, December 22, 2005

7 x 7

CKR at WhirledView has tagged me with a particularly long and involved Internet questionnaire, but you won't hear me grumbling about it. My humble roof may be crumpling under the weight of rodents who've been flooded from their lairs. The children may be coloring in my 1650 edition of The Booke of Pretty Conceits. I may have inadvertantly eaten several large pieces of glass. And I may be right in the middle of writing a post that will hurl the mighty face-first into the dust, and strike the yoke of tyranny from the shoulders of the oppressed. But all of these things can - nay, must - wait. First things first, is my motto.

Seven Things To Do Before I Die

1. Denial and isolation
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Depression
5. Acceptance
6. Burn those pictures of myself wearing that French maid's outfit
7. Take hostages
Seven Things I Cannot Do
1. Admit my incapacities
2. Play drums
3. Drink Retsina
4. Approve of myself
5. Stop buying books
6. The Australian Crawl (The Australian pub crawl, however, comes naturally to me)
7. Pay parking tickets before the fine increases
Seven Things That Attract Me to...Blogging
1. The money
2. The dames
3. The ability to bring down corrupt officials with a single well-turned phrase
4. Multiple deadlines every day!
5. Promoting the neo-Grindletonian worldview
6. Being put under illegal surveillance by a dozen conflicting government agencies that don't communicate with each other
7. Sententious disapproval from halfwits like George Simpson
Seven Things I Say Most Often

Well, I spend a lot of time in the car, so...
1. "What the fuck do you think you're doing?!"
2. "God damn you!"
3. "Maniac!"
4. "Move it, you crazy old fossil!"
5. "Get your Bush-loving ass over to Iraq, you goddamn chickenshit!"
6. "Hope you're enjoying your 4 miles per gallon, jerk!"
7. "Where are all these assholes going?"
Seven Books That I Love
1. Housekeeping - Marilynne Robinson
2. Real Life: Louisville in the Twenties - Michael Lesy
3. Travels in Arabia Deserta - Charles Doughty
4. Moominpappa at Sea - Tove Jansson
5. Sisters By a River - Barbara Comyns
6. English Eccentrics - Edith Sitwell
7. On Growth and Form - D'Arcy Thompson
Seven Movies That I Watch Over and Over Again
1. The Seventh Victim
2. My Man Godfrey
3. Spirit of the Beehive
4. Caught
5. The Set-Up
6. It's a Gift
7. The Shop Around the Corner
Seven People I Want To Join In Too

Let's see...the wife and I both like that red-headed gal at the coffee shop, so...

Hmmm. I'm thinking I misinterpreted the question. I'll start over.

I don't think I've hit NYMary with one of these things yet, so there's a limit to how irritated she can get. And Juniper Pearl seems way too pleasant and even-tempered to get upset with me. Ditto for Hedwig. My pal Eli, of course, is so hypnotically compelling that he can hardly complain if people feel...well, hypnotically compelled by him. That goes double for Watertiger, who is a riddle inside a mystery, wrapped in an enigma and sprinkled with confectioner's sugar. Then there's Wayne...who among us does not love Wayne?

Last, despite her recent harsh words about me, I guess I'll extend a feeler in the general direction of Ann Altmouse.


Anonymous said...

oh no, you rat!
And I just came up with another holiday jingle for you.

NYMary said...

I got you covered.

Anonymous said...

Well done, Phila!


Eli said...


I wonder if I can use my hypnotic powers to make everyone forget that I got tagged...

Ann Altmouse said...

Why are you so full of hate?

Eli said...


I think I need a backrub...

Anonymous said...

Well, I did it, but I couldn't resist mutating it a bit.

The best thing of all was finding out about Ann Altmouse. I can see why she was firm with you, Phila.

GrrlScientist said...

i think i like your answers better than mine. sorry that i dropped the ball, but i answered you anyway.